Even parents who have the best intentions will frequently get it wrong and say something unintentionally offensive and hurtful.
IM GAY WHY AM I GAY FULL
Talk to us.Ĭoming out to your parents is a big deal full stop. It will help educate them on all things LGB and give them the opportunity to speak to other parents for advice. I talk about someone of the opposite sex who I’m genuinely crushing on.
I literally don’t get the big deal about crushes. Whatever reaction your parents have good, bad or ugly, suggest they have a look at these organisations: FFLAG and BeLongTo They are dedicated to supporting parents of lesbian, gay or bisexual sons and daughters and have a wealth of resources nationwide. When someone asks you who you’re crushing on: A name comes to mind immediately, and it’s someone of the same gender. Questions from your parents are natural (but don’t feel pressured into answering things you aren’t comfortable with) and whether you have answers or not just be as honest as you can. Don’t stress yourself out trying to think of every answer ahead of time. One concern can be a barrage of questions, especially knowing the answers can sometimes be awkward and uncomfortable. Show them that you are the same person they’ve always loved, just more honest now. If it’s not what you hoped for, don’t despair or give up. Try not to expect too much from your parents and wherever possible, avoid measuring the success of the conversation by their initial response. Their approval or permission is not required. Decide beforehand whether you are comfortable with them sharing the news of your coming out with your family or if you want it kept between you for the time being – be clear about that. This one can easily be overlooked as you will be so relieved at finally telling them, that its natural to forget to be clear what you want to happen next. There may also never be “the perfect time,” and if there is one, you might lose your nerve and let the opportunity pass – that’s okay, don’t sweat it if that happens and try again. You are in control of this situation and its key you feel as comfortable as possible. So make sure you choose a time that won’t be interrupted and in a place that feels comfortable for you. This news deserves your parent’s full attention. You’ll know if it’s best to tell them separately or together so trust your instincts. Start with the parent you feel safer talking to.
If there is one parent you are more nervous about telling, you don’t have to tell them together. You don’t have to tell them both at the same time. Your safety and wellbeing should always come first. What might be the right thing for one person, may not be right for you. It is crucial that you take the time to consider your own personal circumstances when making the decision to come out to your parents. Determine whether this is the right time. They only just found out so remember first reactions are not always lasting reactions and they will need time to process this information. You have had months or even years to come to a place of acceptance and being ready to share it. When coming out to your parents whether they suspect anything or not, this is the first time they are hearing this news.